The First Hunt
by Kyriebess
Summary: My version of Sam's first hunt and why hunting was never his favorite past time. Sam goes on his first hunt with his father and brother and learns many things about hunting and himself. Young Sam and Dean..Samcentric..ProtectiveSupportive Dean..Twoshot
1. Chapter 1

_Hi! I'm back! I know this kind of story's been done a million times, but this one's my take. _

_ I'm actually in the process of writing another story right now called The Solo Hunts, which I won't be uploading here until I finish it. Anyway, in that story Sam remembers the happier moments of his first hunt on two different occasions. This story grew out of those two memory scenes. _

_ So, if you read this story and like it, keep a look out for The Solo Hunts. If not, then nevermind..._

_ This story will be short- it's a two shot. Dean's 13/14, Sam's 9/10 (for those who prefer: Seventh grade and Third grade)  
_

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**The First Hunt**

"Okay Sammy, you remember what we went over." Sam looked up at his father and nodded as his father continued, "You stay here by the truck, I'll chase the Agrios to you. When you see it, you shoot and you keep shooting till it's down."

Sam looked down at the large revolver in his hands. Biting his lip, he looked back up at his father, "What if I miss?"

His dad shook his head, "You won't miss kiddo. You're a good shot. You just have to hit the Agrios anywhere. It's the silver in the bullet that kills; it's like poison to them. It doesn't matter where you hit it."

Sam watched as his father went to the back of the truck to gather the weapons that he and Dean would need for their part of the hunt. Fighting his nervousness, Sam took a deep breath, blowing the hair out of his eyes as he exhaled. He looked over and Dean smiled at him.

"You excited Sammy? First hunt…biggest day of your life." Dean grinned proudly at him. Sam gave a hesitant smile back, excited wasn't the word he would have chosen. Terrified would have been a better word. Tonight was to be his first hunt; his first kill. Sam desperately wanted to be successful, to make his father and brother proud. After tonight he would be one of them…no longer a baby. He wouldn't have to wait with one of his dad's friends while his father and brother hunted together. After tonight he would be able to share with his family the most important part of being a Winchester. Tonight he would become a hunter.

That, of course, was provided he didn't screw up, miss the shot, or get killed.

Despite his father's assurances that Agrios Giants were among the easiest creatures to kill (one shot anywhere), going face to face with a creature that was half man, half bear, six feet tall, and fed on human flesh was not something he was looking forward to. He had seen pictures of the beast, but Sam wondered what the creature would look like when it was only a few feet in front of him and looking to kill him.

A strong hand on his shoulder ended his reverie. "Sammy, Dean will wait over there in those trees; I'm gonna go in now and draw the beast out. You ready?"

Sam looked up and nodded. His father smiled and squeezed his shoulder before marching into the forest. Desperately nervous, Sam moved backwards until he felt the truck up at his back and then slid down. With an effort, he lifted the heavy gun, checking to make sure it was ready. The safety was off, but it needed to be cocked. Unable to cock the gun with one hand, Sam turned to his brother. "Dean?"

Dean turned around from where he was staring into the forest, "Yeah Sammy."

Sam held up the gun, "I can't cock this. It's too heavy."

Dean sighed and walked over, crouching down by his brother, "Well why didn't you tell dad? If you can't ready the gun then you should have a smaller one."

Sam shrugged, "I didn't want him to get mad at me."

Dean rolled his eyes, "I think he'd be more mad at the fact that you went on a hunt with a gun that you can't handle. That's not responsible Sammy."

Sam exhaled loudly and looked to his brother for help. Dean saw the look and nodded, "Okay. Here. Put the gun like this." Dean laid the gun on the ground and placed Sam's foot on top of the muzzle. "Now, hold the gun down with your foot and use both your hands to push the hammer back." Sam followed his brother's instructions with a look of intense concentration. He pushed on the hammer with as much effort as he could muster and was rewarded with a click. Relieved, he smiled up at Dean.

Dean looked at him seriously, "Is this the gun you've been practicing with?"

Sam nodded and then looked unsure, "I think so."

"You think so? This isn't a game Sammy. We're counting on you to kill this thing. Have you ever fired this gun before?"

Sam shrugged, "I guess it's the one I practiced with…daddy gave it to me tonight when we got here."

Dean continued to look serious. If their father had given it to Sam, then it was probably Sam's gun, but it was disconcerting to Dean that his brother didn't seem to positively recognize it. Again he spoke seriously to his brother, "This is a big gun. It's packs a lot of recoil. You ready for that?"

Sam nodded, "I'm gonna sit against the truck so I don't fall back."

Dean seemed pleased with that answer, "Okay. Let me see how you hold it."

Sam licked his lips and held the gun out in front of him, forearms on his knees to help distribute the weight. Dean smiled and tousled his hair, "Yep, you're all ready."

Dean got up to walk to his position and Sam frowned. Noticing the frown, Dean questioned his brother. "What's with the face?"

Sam looked up at his brother, "I'm scared."

Dean crouched back down in front of him. "You'll be fine Sammy. There's nothing for you to worry about. I've got your back."

Sam looked down at the large gun in his hands, "But what if I miss the shot? What if I screw up?"

Dean smoothed out his hair and squeezed his shoulder, "If that happens, which it won't, I've got you covered. If you miss, I'll shoot it. I promise. Nothing bad's gonna happen to you." Adolescent Dean flashed a trademark grin, "Not while I'm around."

Sam smiled at his brother, grateful for the support and reassurance. Dean winked and took up his position in the woods. Once again Sam was left to his own thoughts, but not for long. Within a few minutes of Dean's departure, Sam heard the sounds of something running and crashing threw the forest. Realizing that the Agrios was coming, Sam bit his lip, straightened his arms, and lined up his sight.

A large mass of fur gradually appeared through the outline of the forest. The fur grew bigger as the creature ran closer, headed directly for Sam. Not wanting to miss the shot and scare away the beast, Sam bided his time until the creature was close enough that Sam was confident he could hit it.

The creature came closer and Sam held his breath. The beast was huge. Long brown, coarse fur covered its body and three inch sharp claws hung from its hands. The Agrios glared fiercely at Sam, running with its mouth open, hundreds of sharp teeth dripping with saliva. Sam focused on the terrifying teeth as the creature ran towards him. Then, when almost all of his visual field was encompassed by fur, Sam fired, aiming for the beast's chest.

The gun recoiled, but Sam had a good grip and was propped up against the truck, so he was able to easily steady himself. Upon being hit by the bullet, the beast flew back and skidded on the ground finally coming to a stop about 10 feet from the truck. Sam readied his gun again, waiting for more movement…but none came. The beast was dead.

Breathing an enormous sigh of relief, Sam uncocked his gun, pushed on the safety, and placed the weapon in the back of his pants, like his father and brother had shown him. Weapon now secure, Sam cautiously stood up.

Standing on his toes, he peered over at the dead beast. It still hadn't moved. Assured that the creature was dead, Sam became excited.

"I did it! I did it!" Sam looked around wildly for his father and brother as he jumped up and down. Suddenly his father came into view and lifted him high in the air, hugging him.

Sam's smile covered his face as his dad beamed proudly at him, "Did you see dad? I did it!"

Sam shook up and down with excitement in his father's arms. "Yeah I saw. You did real good Sammy."

"Hey! Check it out! You shot it right in the heart!" Sam looked over to where his brother was inspecting the dead creature. Wanting to see more, Sam wiggled in his father's hold until he was placed back on the ground. Immediately he ran over to his brother to try to see his shot in the creature's chest.

Sam stared hard, trying to see the hole or the blood that his brother was seeing, but the darkness of night impeded his vision. He couldn't see the shot, but Dean said it went through the creature's heart, so it must have been there.

Sam began jumping again, "Dean! Did you see me? Did you see me shoot it!"

Dean laughed, reached out an arm, and pulled his brother into a one armed hug. "Yeah Sammy, I saw you." Sam wrapped his arms around his brother's midsection and squeezed with all his might. Dean ruffled his hair and Sam squeezed harder.

"Owff" Dean laughed and pushed his brother back. "Geeze Sammy, when'd you get so strong?"

Sam giggled and resumed looking at the creature. Still not finding his shot, Sam walked around to the other side of the hairy beast as Dean and his father discussed something by the truck. From the other side of the creature, Sam still couldn't see his shot. Cautiously, he leaned closer to the beast's chest, periodically checking the creature's face to make sure it wasn't going to spring back to life.

With his face 6 inches from the beast's chest, Sam finally saw a bloody hole in the fur. Delighted that he had found the hole, he immediately jumped back up and called to his family, "Look! I shot it in the heart!"

Too engrossed in their own conversation, Sam was ignored. Looking back at the hole as though to be sure it was still there, Sam called out again, "Dad! Dean!" Once again he was ignored.

Tired of being ignored, Sam ran over to his father and brother, grabbed one hand each and began to pull them towards the dead beast. "Come on. I wanna show you. Come here."

His family sighed, still smiling and allowed themselves to be dragged over to the creature. Sam pointed at the bullet hole, "Look! I shot it in the heart!"

His father laughed and nodded, "Yeah, I see. You did good Sammy. You did real good. You really pulled your weight tonight." Sam beamed under his father's praise.

Looking up, he turned to Dean, "Dean! Did you see? I shot it in the heart!"

Dean rolled his eyes and put his hand on Sam's shoulder, "Yeah already. I saw it Sammy. It was a great shot…don't let it go to your head."

Once again Sam hugged his brother with all his might and Dean similarly hugged him back.

His father spoke, "Okay guys. Sammy took care of the mother, so there's three cubs out there. I know where their cave is and without her they're defenseless. So, let's lock and load."

The smile vanished from Sam's face and his arms left Dean's waist and fell limply to his sides. Dean followed their father back to the truck to get the weapons out of the back, but Sam hardly noticed. Fear and sadness was creeping through his body and straight into his heart. The creature, which had once been deadly and scary with its hairy body and sharp teeth seemed to change. The hair and the teeth remained, but now Sam wasn't looking at the evil beast that he had killed. Now he was looking at the mother that he had murdered.

Sam could easily identify with the creature's cubs. They were somewhere out there, alone and afraid and pretty soon they would be hunted and killed, with no one to protect them…because Sam had killed their protector.

Dean's voice rang out, "Hey Sammy! Stop gloating over your kill and come on."

Still staring at the dead mother, Sam quickly shook his head. Dean ran over to him and pulled on his shirt, "Let's go Sammy. We got three more to kill." He looked up at his brother as Dean finished, "One for each of us."

With a miserable look on his face, Sam shook his head again, and looked back down. Their father approached, "Look alive Sammy. We don't have all night. We need to get the cubs before sun up."

"I don't want to." Sam kept his head down to avoid looking at his father. Dean put his hand on Sam's shoulder, "What's wrong Sammy? You were excited 2 seconds ago…"

"I don't want to kill the babies"

Sam heard his father sigh. "They're not babies, kiddo. They're evil and if they're allowed to lived past tonight, they'll grow up to kill and eat people."

Sam shook his head again, "But they didn't kill anything yet…maybe they won't."

"Sammy…" Their father was losing his patience. "They will; that's what Agrios Giant's do. They feed off human flesh. You want to wait until they kill someone and then kill them?" Sam looked up and nodded. His father nodded back, "Well then you can explain to that person's family why their mother, father, brother, sister is dead…because _you_ wanted to wait. You explain to them how you could've prevented their death, but decided instead to do nothing."

Tears came to Sam's eyes and he bit his lip. He didn't want that to happen, but it just didn't feel right to him, killing a child, much less one that hadn't yet killed anything.

"Let's go Sammy. You've got a job to finish." Sam watched as his father and brother began to walk off. He was caught between wanting to please his father and not wanting to kill the cubs. He didn't know what to do, so he just stood next to the dead creature.

Apparently realizing that they weren't being followed, Dean and his father turned back to Sam. Dean sighed, trying to intervene before their father lost his temper, "Sammy come on. You did real good before. Don't mess it up."

Sam mashed his lips together and shook his head.

"Sam!" Sam flinched as his father spoke his name in an intimidating stern voice. "You take out your gun and you come with us _now_."

The words were spoken slowly and held an air of authority that refused argument. However, Sam didn't seem to hear the authority, "Can't I just wait in the truck?"

Sam watched Dean wince at the question. Their father's eyes became dark and their gaze seemed to pierce through Sam's soul. After several moments of controlled breathing, the man spoke. The words were quiet and calm, holding back a torrent of underlying rage, "Fine. You don't want to finish what you started? Fine. Go wait in the truck." Sam flinched and caught the keys his father threw at him. His hands shaking, Sam held his breath as his father continued. "You lock the doors and you don't move until we get back. You understand?"

Sam nodded, "Yes sir." Then he looked over at his brother for assurance…but there was none there. Dean looked upset- a combination of disappointed and worried. Sam's frown deepened; he had managed to anger his father and disappoint his brother…and they had been so proud of him before. He looked back down at the dead creature. Now that he knew she was a mother, he could see her breasts through the fur. That was somebody's mother. Despite what the Agrios had done, Sam reasoned that she couldn't have been _all _evil. She protected her children, which meant she loved her children and most likely, the people she had killed, she had killed to feed her children. How could someone who loved their babies be evil?

Realizing that his father and brother were waiting for him to make his final decision, Sam turned around, unlocked the passenger door and got into the truck. He then closed the door and locked it. Through the window, he made eye contact with his father and brother one last time before they turned and walked into the woods. His father's arm was around Dean's shoulder and Sam frowned at the sight. His father was proud of Dean because Dean could hunt- Dean could kill. Tonight was supposed to be his night. He was supposed to become one of them…and now, once again, he was watching from the window.

Sam looked through the window at his kill. He had done that…ended that beast's life and as a result, ended the lives of her children. Tears began to slip down Sam's cheeks. He knew that hunting would be scary, but he never expected it to be so sad. Whenever his father and brother returned from a hunt, they'd be happy. They'd be excited about how many things they'd killed. And even Pastor Jim, he'd be excited too. When Dean and their father were out hunting, Pastor Jim would tell Sam how exciting his first hunt would be- how 'there's nothing like your first kill…knowing you took some evil out of the world.'

Sam looked back down at the creature. He didn't feel happy or excited…not anymore. Sam wondered if this is what hunting was really like, if every evil thing that they killed had a family. Sam wondered about the demon that killed his mom…did it also have a family? Was every hunt going to leave him feeling like he was as evil as the creatures they were hunting? His father and brother were right now killing baby creatures that hadn't committed one evil act. What was the difference between what the Agrios were doing and what his family was doing? What made one side good and the other evil?

Sam's view through the window was suddenly filled with hair. Sam's eyes became wide and his breath stuck in his throat. It was another creature. Briefly Sam wondered if it was one of the babies, but then thought better of the idea. This creature was even larger than the one Sam had killed. "It must be the daddy."

Sam watched from the window as the creature made it's way over to its dead mate. It touched the dead beast and sniffed the air around it. Sam watched the beasts nostrils flare as it inhaled. Then the beast turned to the truck.

For a moment Sam made eye contact with the beast and in that moment an understanding was made. The Agrios knew that Sam had been the one to make that fatal shot- and Sam knew that the creature was going to kill him…avenge the mother of its children. Sam wondered if his father had given the demon that same look.

Breaking the eye contact, Sam pulled his gun from the back of his pants and slunk across the seat and under the truck's steering wheel. He held the too heavy gun out in front of him with his shaking hands as he looked up at the passenger side window. Sam strained his hearing, but couldn't make out where the sounds of crunching leaves were coming from. His hands shook and his heart pounded in his chest. He wished for his father- or Dean- either one- or maybe both. Desperately Sam tried to control his breathing, which was coming in gasps.

Then he saw it…a mist appeared in the center of the window and then cleared up. A few seconds later, it happened again. Sam checked his gun, quickly pushed the safety off. Then he put the gun on the floor of the truck, stepped on it, and cocked it…just like his brother had shown him. His gun now ready, Sam looked back up at the window. The creature was staring at him.

Sam shrieked and pushed back against the driver's door; tears filled his eyes. With his arms resting on his knees, he aimed his gun- two fingers on the trigger. He had a perfect shot of the creature's head, but the glass window was in the way. Sam remembered that if his bullet hit the beast anywhere it would kill, but would the bullet hit the beast if the glass was in the way? He didn't know what to do. And suddenly the creature was gone.

Sam sat shaking with his heart pounding in his chest. Once again he strained to hear the Agrios outside the truck, but he could hear nothing over the sound of his racing heart and gasps for breath.

Sam waited there, struggling to hear, focused on the window above him. Suddenly, the driver's door was ripped from the truck. Sam fell backwards and screamed as he felt claws rip into his back. Tears fell from his eyes and he twisted himself around pulling the trigger on the gun. It was a blind shot- fired in the general area of 'behind him'. Sam continued his tumble out of the truck, landing on his head and back. Immediately he sat himself up and pushed himself against the side of the truck, gun out in front.

Regaining his wits, Sam stared at the scene in front of him. The creature was lying on its back unmoving with the truck door still attached to its right hand. Part of the beast's body was obscured by the door lying on top of it. The Agrios' long ugly foot laid next to Sam, almost touching him.

Sam figured that the beast was most likely dead, given the fact that it wasn't moving, but he wasn't sure. Aiming his gun at the leg nearest to him, Sam fired. The gun hit him in the face as it recoiled and the leg jumped at the impact.

Now openly crying, Sam rubbed his head and accepted the fact that the Agrios daddy was dead.

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_Ok, so? Like it, hate it? Worst story you ever read? Review and lemme know..._


	2. Chapter 2

_Hey all! So, here's part 2 (the final chapter). I'm going back to finishing my other story now. I hope you all enjoyed this little one..._

_ Thank you all so much for your reviews. It's so much easier to write when you know other people are enjoying the story. Thank you, thank you, thank you. _

_ Bubblez, LRP, Layla- Thanks for reviewing and letting me know that you like it. See...I didn't take too long to update. :-)  
_

_Oh- and this chapter was all wish fulfillment for me as the episodes of Season 2 have left me yelling, "Hug damn it!" at the screen every time. So thanks for allowing me to endulge in my little gratuitous hugging fantasy... _

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**Part 2-**

Overcome with emotion from the night's events, Sam let his gun drop to the floor and carefully laid down into a fetal position. He was shaking and he could feel his fingers slowly turn freezing cold. His back burned and throbbed and the pain increased Sam's cries. And to top it off, was the dull pain in the center of his forehead, where the gun had hit him. All the night's events melded together leading Sam to one inevitable conclusion…hunting sucked.

Pain prevented any deeper thought and Sam called out for his family, "Dad! Dean!" Desperately, he listened for a response, but all that he could hear were crickets and the wind rustling through the trees. Overwhelmed with a need for his father and brother, Sam tried again, louder, "Dad! Dean!" This time he didn't wait for a response, he just cried.

Sam laid crying for the next few minutes, gasping between sobs. He wiped his nose with his sleeve and hugged his arms to his chest. He wanted his father…he wanted his brother.

He looked at the creature lying dead a few feet away from him. He needed Dean to come back. Dean had said that bad things wouldn't happen if he was around, and he had been right. When Dean was there, nothing bad had happened. Sam had killed the beast without even getting scratched. Then Dean went away and look what happened. Sam nodded his head determined…from now on he would stay with Dean all the time. Then nothing bad would happen…just like Dean said.

Now having a plan to avoid future pain and terror, Sam began to calm. Gradually, his wracking breaths decreased into a silent stream of tears. His back still hurt fiercely and every time he thought about the pain, his lips would begin to tremble and his headache would increase.

Suddenly Sam heard the snapping of a branch as someone or something coming out of the woods on the other side of the truck. Fighting down his nausea, Sam held his breath silently pleading for whatever it was to not hurt him anymore. Then he heard the voice…it was his father.

All at once, Sam sprung to life, wiped off his tears, and ran around the back of the truck to see his father. He felt immensely relieved; his dad and Dean were back and he would be safe again. Sam ran around the truck and over to his father. However, he stopped short at his father's shocked face.

"What the hell are you doing out of the truck!" Sam took a step back, emotions turning from relief to fear in the blink of an eye. His father pointed a finger at him, speaking in a low voice, "I gave you an order Sammy. I told you to get in that truck and not move until we got back."

Inundated with fear from his run in with the Agrios and the anger in his father's face, Sam froze, barely breathing. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw his brother looking at him, reading him. His father walked forward filled with anger. "Sammy."

Sam felt himself going numb; all the pain and fear was slowly drifting away. He couldn't answer his father; he didn't know what to say. So he just stood. As his father approached, Sam felt his face relax and his eyes begin to stare off. His father called his name again, "Sammy."

Sam stared blankly into the trees. His father crouched in front of him, grabbing his face and turning it towards him, "Damn it Sammy. You look at me when I'm talking to you. This isn't a game being out here. When I give you an order I expect you to follow it."

Sam processed the anger, but not the words. He had no reaction, he just continued to stare. Sam felt his father grab his shoulders, about to continue his rant, and then stop. Sam watched his father's face turn from enraged to panicked and concerned. His dad's hand came off of his right shoulder and appeared in between them. They both looked at it; the fingertips were covered in blood.

Sensing something was wrong from the silence, Dean came over and stood beside them. "Dad?"

Their father shook his head slowly still staring at his hand. Then, quickly, he turned Sam around and gasped. Dean got a second to look at the three long gashes that ran across his brother's back before Sam was whirled around again, back to facing their father.

Sam felt his father put a hand on his face, "Sammy…what happened?"

Sam felt detached; he had no feeling- emotional or physical. He was unable to answer his father and instead, continued his blank stare. Suddenly, his father looked up and over his shoulder, "Dean wait."

Sam heard his brother's voice call out from behind him, "I was going to check the other side of the truck. That's where Sammy came from."

Their father nodded, "I know. I'll do it. You stay here with him."

Dean nodded and put away his gun. Then he ran over and bent down next to his brother. Their father, in turn, pulled out his own gun and walked around the truck.

As the experienced hunter investigated the area, Dean turned his attention to his brother. "Sammy?"

Sam stared at the floor and Dean crouched in front of him to try again, "Sammy what happened to your back?"

Sam's eyes lifted and met his brother's. Dean was overcome by the emotion the eyes possessed. Sam had NEVER looked like that. The innocence, the joy, the admiration the eyes had once held had disappeared leaving no trace that those things ever existed. Looking into his brother's eyes, Dean felt a piece of himself disappear as well; Sammy might heal from this night, but Dean knew his brother would never be the same.

Dean's face grew sad, expressing his reaction to his brother's pain, "Sammy. Come on buddy. Talk to me."

Sam said nothing, but continued to stare blankly. Dean's eyes began to grow watery, "Sammy please…you're scaring me."

The shock and apparent absurdity of that comment crashed through Sam's soul, jolting him out of his shell. Dean never got scared. Dean never cried. Dean was perfect. Dean knew everything. Dean could handle anything. How could Dean be scared?

Sam's thoughts resumed, his eyes focused, and the pain returned full force. Tears quickly filled and then spilled out of his eyes. Thrust back into pain and fear, Sam immediately reached forward and wrapped his arms around his brother's neck, clinging as though his life depended on it.

Dean moved to hug him in return, but then stopped as he remembered Sam's back. Not wanting to inadvertently inflict pain on his brother, Dean moved his arms down and lifted Sam up and instantly Sam's legs wrapped around his waist.

Sam was heavy; it had been a long time since Dean had picked his brother up. Sam was too old for that now, but tonight Dean bore the weight without complaint. Sam shook in his arms as heaving sobs wracked his frame. Unable to do much under his brother's weight, Dean began to rock back and forth in an attempt to calm Sam.

Finally their father came back into view. He immediately bent down at Dean's shoulder to look at Sam's face. He put a hand on Dean's back and Dean stopped the rocking. Their father spoke, "Sammy? Come on son, I need you to look at me."

Sam ignored his father and continued crying into his brother's shoulder.

Dean watched out of the corner of his eye as his father tried to remove Sam's arms from around Dean's shoulders, presumably so he could look at Sam. But Sam resisted and Dean choked as his brother squeezed tighter. All those 'squeeze as hard as I can' hugs had been paid off. Sam seemed to be well trained in how to perform a death grip.

Dean heard his father sigh as he gave up trying to extricate Sam. "Dean?" Dean turned so that he was facing his father. "Bring Sammy over to the truck; sit him on the edge of the bed."

Dean nodded relieved, Sam's weight and crushing arms were beginning to get to him. Dean walked over to the back of the truck and did as his father had asked. Now seated on the truck, Sam was slightly taller than his brother and used the added height to wrap his arms further around Dean's shoulders and back. Dean made a choking sound as Sam leaned forward more, pressing his shoulder into Dean's neck.

Careful of his brother's back, Dean gently loosened Sam's grip and pulled his shoulder from his neck. Sam sat back slightly and Dean could once again see his brother's face. Sam's death hug had become a death _grasp_ as he clenched both of Dean's upper arms with such force that Dean was positive there'd be bruises.

Dean stared at his brother. Sam was trembling, although the hysterical crying had stopped. Tears streaked his face, his nose was running, eyes were bloodshot, and he looked around wildly as he sat. Suddenly, their father appeared next to them holding a first aide kit. Dean turned to his dad, "Dad, what happened?"

His father answered as he removed alcohol, peroxide, and bandages from the kit. "The door's been ripped off the truck, and I found a dead adult male Agrios and Sammy's gun."

Dean was surprised, "Sammy took down an adult male?"

Their father looked up and briefly smiled in pride, "Shot him in the head and the leg."

Dean smiled and looked at Sam expecting his brother to relish in the pride they were showing him. But Sam's face was anything but happy and proud. Instead, his face radiated misery and torment. He stared blankly past his family seemingly unaware that they had been talking at all.

But that wasn't the case. Sam had heard the surprise from his brother and the pride from his father, but somehow he couldn't find any happiness in it. Normally he would have been delighted to surprise his brother- Dean was not easy to shock. And earning his father's pride? That was an absolute honor.

Earlier today, Sam had wanted nothing more than to make his father and brother proud…to impress them. But now…he didn't understand it. Their pride seemed to make no sense. Where was the happiness in ending a life? What was there to be proud of? He had been terrified and blindly shot into the air as a matter of survival. There was no pride or happiness in survival, at least not to Sam. The experience had been horrible and Sam WOULD have been happy - if he never repeated it.

For the first time in his life Sam began to question if he was different from his family…if he wanted different things than they did. He never thought of it before. Before, if dad or Dean said it was good- then it was good. If they said it was bad- it was bad. If they said he should be proud- he felt proud. But tonight? Tonight Sam's emotions and ideals took a turn and for the first time, he began to think for himself.

Awareness once again crept into Sam's thoughts as he watched his father try to pry his right hand off of Dean's arm. Dean's voice came through his ears, "What's wrong with him dad? Why isn't he answering us?"

Their father shook his head with a haunted look and gave up on the hand. He looked at Sam's face, smoothing out the hair behind his son's head. Sam said nothing. He watched his father take a deep breath and draw Sam's head towards his chest. Sam didn't fight the pull, but didn't let go of his brother's arms either.

Once his head was against his father's chest, Sam felt his father carefully hug him (not touching his back) and kiss the top of his head. The tension seemed to melt from his body and he leaned into his father's hold. Even the hands released their clutch, falling limply to his lap.

Dean began rubbing Sam's left arm in a slow soothing motion and Sam relaxed even more. The safety of his father's arms and his brother's touch sent all sadness and pain from his thoughts. Sam closed his eyes as he began to drift into sleep.

Dean turned to his father as he watched Sam's eyes shut, "He's falling asleep."

His father sighed and nodded, smoothing Sam's hair. Dean continued stroking his brother's arm before he bit his lip and spoke again, "Dad?"

Their father looked down at him and Dean continued, "I thought you killed the male yesterday."

He had tried his best not to make it sound like an accusation, but it was one and no matter how it was presented, the content was the same. Dean held his breath as he tried to read his father's face. At first he thought his dad looked angry, but then figured he had imagined that because that's what he would have expected. Staring at his father's face, Dean found that he couldn't pick out any emotions. Somehow the man had managed to hide them all behind a blank mask. Dean viewed him in admiration, wondering if someday he'd be able to guard himself like that. A skill like that would come in handy when facing down an enemy.

Finally, their father spoke, "I killed _a_ male yesterday…must have been a single boar." Then his father shook his head, anger and regret showing on his face. Dean heard the words, although he knew his father wasn't whispering them to him. "I was stupid. I knew Sammy was coming. I should've made sure of how many adults we were dealing with." His father shook his head again, "I never saw the marks of a second male."

Dean sat quietly, a little sorry he had brought it up. He didn't like to hear his father admit to mistakes. He didn't like to know his father made mistakes.

The man spoke again, this time at Dean, "Your brother should have been with us. He's going to need to learn to follow orders."

A part of Dean flared up in defense of his brother, and he spoke without thinking, "You told him he could stay in the truck."

There was no masking emotions this time; anger flashed on the hunter's face as he turned to Dean. "Watch your attitude Dean. I can't have him questioning me during a hunt. He could get hurt…or killed." His father kissed the top of Sam's head- case in point.

Dean nodded and mumbled, "Yes sir."

Their father sighed and took a step back, guiding the sleeping Sam towards his brother. Dean moved forward and arranged his brother so that Sam's head was on his shoulder, facing their father.

A pair of scissors was used to carefully cut off the back of Sam's shirt. Pain entered Sam's awareness gradually lifting sleep as the bloody shirt was peeled from the gashes. Sam moaned in Dean's arms, shifting away from the pain. Dean leaned his cheek against his brother's head and resumed stroking his arm in an attempt to soothe him.

By the time the shirt was off, Sam was once again awake, although still lethargic from his short nap. He held his arms loosely around his brother's waist. Sam blinked as his father's face appeared in front of him. "Sammy? I need to clean your back now son. This is going to hurt, but I'll try to be quick, ok?" Sam gave no sign that he heard the man.

His father put his hand on his cheek and tried again, "Sammy?" Sam said nothing. Dean looked to his father for an explanation and grew nervous seeing the fear in his father's eyes. The man leaned down again, "Sammy, tell me your name."

Dean held his breath waiting for Sam's answer, but none came. Once again he looked at his father and felt his pulse quicken as he watched his father close his eyes in defeat. Dean's fear intensified when his father reopened his eyes and Dean saw that they were filled with tears.

"Dad? What's wrong with him?"

His father took a breath and shook himself out of his reverie. He looked over at Dean's worried face and tried to be reassuring, "He's just scared…because of what happened." Then he patted Dean's shoulder sounding more confident, "He'll be ok once we get him home."

Dean accepted the reassurance and prepared himself for his brother's pain. Their father picked up the alcohol, steadied himself, and then poured it over Sam's back. Immediately, Sam screamed in pain and began crying. Dean hugged his waist with one hand and continued stroking Sam's upper arm with the other. Sam's arms moved up and hugged his brother's torso. Sam's face turned, burying itself in Dean's shoulder.

Their father worked quickly, as promised, washing out dirt, cleaning the gashes, applying ointment, and bandaging them. The middle gash had required stitches, but compared to the pain of the alcohol, Sam hardly felt them. Throughout the ordeal, Sam tried to ignore the pain. At first it was difficult, but as the ministrations went on, and the pain from the alcohol receded, Sam found that he could focus on his brother's rubbing on his arm as a way of distracting him from the pain.

Finally, to the great relief of all three, the first aide came to an end and Dean watched his father put the first aide kit away. Sam had once again relaxed under his brother's touch and was beginning to doze off. Their father turned to Dean, "I've got to finish this and burn the Agrios bodies. Can you get him into the truck?"

Dean nodded and as proof, lifted his brother up. Unprepared, Sam began to slide out of Dean's hold, but Dean shifted, pushing up his brother's weight. Their father smiled at Dean, "Good man Dean. Get him into the truck; I should be done with the bodies in ten minutes. Get your gun out and look alive once you're in." Their father looked around, "I think we got all of them, but…"

Dean nodded, he understood. His father had missed the second male, so he might have missed more as well. Dean reassured his father, "Don't worry dad. I got him."

His father smiled again, squeezing Dean's shoulder, and then turned to unload the gasoline from the truck bed. Dean made his way with his brother, into the truck. Once in the truck, Dean arranged it so that Sam would be seated between him and their father. Sam's sleepy head laid against his chest and Dean's left hand resumed its comforting stroke on his brother's arm. Dean's right hand held the gun.

Dean began thinking as he waited for his father to return. In a way, his dad was right. Sam shouldn't have refused to obey their father in the middle of the hunt. Sam should have come with them. If he had been with them, he wouldn't have gotten hurt. But their father was as much to blame as Sam was. Their father was in charge. No matter what Sam had done, it was their father who had finally allowed Sam to wait in the truck alone. At the very least he should've had Dean wait with Sam. How was he supposed to protect Sam if Sam wasn't with him? Dean shook his head making a vow not to ever let this happen again. He looked down at the head of hair tucked under his arm, "From now on, when we hunt…you and I always stay together."

Thinking Sam was asleep, Dean expected no response, so he was shocked when he felt Sam nod against his chest in agreement.

Dean opened his mouth to talk to his brother, but was interrupted when his father jumped into the truck. The driver's door was still missing, but it didn't seem to bother their father who quickly turned on the ignition.

Sam lifted his head from its place on Dean's chest, "Dad?"

Both boys watched as their father looked down, relief and love radiating from his eyes at the sound of his son's voice, "Yeah Sammy."

Sam's gaze reached his father's heart, "I don't like hunting." A sad recognition of the comment showed on their father's face before it was quickly shook off, his expression returning to relief and love. Sam felt his father smooth out his hair and then the truck was thrown into drive…calling an end to Sam's first hunt and leaving a family of dead Agrios and an nine-year-old boy's innocence in it's wake.

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_Please let me know what you thought. What parts did you like (if any)? What did you hate? Review and help bring a bit of joy to my life!_


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